Shower Me in Love
by booboosofetch
Summary: Action, Romance, Sex, and Love. This saucy Cherimon has it all! Over 14,000 views! Thank you lovely viewers! And a very special thank you to cluelessinCanada and MiaLawliet for giving me ideas in my time of need! BoyXBoy Cherimon
1. Chapter 1

Charlie's POV:

I close the door to the bathroom, securely, before beginning to strip. I remove my shirt briskly, messing up my hair. I slide down me loose jeans without undoing the buttons. I sigh as I stare at my half naked self in the mirror. My mussy brown hair clings to the pasty white skin of my cheek bones. My chest is flat and undeveloped. My criticisms continue down my slender frame, until I get fed up and remove my boxers, directing my thoughts to the shower.

I step into the bath tub, cautiously; pulling closed the curtain behind me. The water spurts out of the faucet as I turn the handle. I grimace as the cold water splashes over my toes. I wait for the water to warm before turning on the shower head. It spills on to my head, drenching my hair. I sigh as the warm water creeps down my body. The slowly dribbling water makes my moan softly as it travels across my skin. It feels so good. I take a moment to savor the sensation before washing. I pick up my bottle of shampoo. It is empty. I throw the empty bottle over the curtain. I will just have to use Alex's until I can get some more. I pick up my Flat-mate's bottle of shampoo and squirt some on to my palm. I run it through my shaggy hair, rubbing it in before washing it out. I pick up the bar of soap and a wash rag. I am about to wash when I hear Alex's muffled voice come through the door.

"Charlie?"

"I'm in the shower, Alex."

"I've gotta use the lue."

"Alright, come on in, but no peeking."

I smile to myself, secretly wishing he would.

Alex opens the door and slides in, quietly. I proceed to my washing, trying to ignore the sound of him undoing his trousers. My attempts fail. The image of Alex's cock invades my brain. I soak my head in the running water, trying to wash that thought from my head. In doing this, I do not hear the extra rumple of clothing after Alex flushes the toilet. I do not notice what is happening until I see the curtain rustle.

"Alex, what did I-"

My thoughts are cut off as I am greeted by the image of an entirely naked Alex. I gasp slightly, my grin fading to an awed expression.

"What- What are you doing?" I ask, lamely.

I can't keep my eyes off his naked body.

"I'm quite a _dirty _boy, Charlie. I figured I needed a wash."

"You- You could have just asked," I stutter, again, "I would have hurried along. You could have just waited…"

My voice trails off as Alex steps closer to me. My eyes trail up and down his body. I bite my bottom lip. He was quite good looking. That I had always known. But I had never seen him like this. I was surprised how attracted I was to him. Alex keeps moving closer, leaning toward me until our lips are nearly touching. I become short of breath. He had never been this close to me. All I wanted was to kiss him.

"You're so nice, Charlie," Alex whispers in my mouth. There are more then a few meanings behind this statement.

I swallow, hard, trying to sort my thoughts.

"I can be not so nice," I attempted it to sound flirty but my voice was hoarse with nervousness, "If you want..," I finish lamely.

He smiles at me, leaning forward the two centimeters between his lips and mine. I close my eyes, welcoming the kiss. His hands wander behind me, pulling me further in to the kiss.

I had dreamt of this so many times. Being close to Alex, holding him, snogging him, but I shook it off, thinking it would never happen. Yet here I was, kissing my best mate, and he was kissing me.

I grope at him in return. One hand on the small of his back, the other in his now wet hair.

Our passionate kiss turns to a snog as I welcome his tongue in to my mouth. My fingers tangle is his messy locks, pulling him closer to me.

There was so much heat between us. I was hungry to touch him. I turn, pressing him against the wall. He moans as the cold stone presses against his bare back. This sensation only adds to the passion of our kiss. I press myself to him, thirsty for him. I let my lips travel from him, exploring his body with my tongue. He replies with tiny gasps and moans syblising his pleasure. I grin as I kiss down his chest and pass his belly button. He groans with anticipation as I near his groin. I stop in front of Alex's hard cock, grinning at him wickedly. Alex presses him self to the wall, his hips shaking in anticipation.

"Charlie, please," he pleads.

I toy at his head with my tongue before gingery placing my lips around his penis. His breathing becomes heavy with anticipation and pleasure. I work my way up his length slowly and gently. He gasps and moans.

I suck on it a short wile. Slowly, teasing him. I pull away, glaring up at him.

"Oh fuck, Charlie, please don't stop."

I lick him from the tip up to his balls, teasing him.

"Charlie, please."

I let the water from the running shower to drop on his tender penis. He gasps from the sensation it brings but it's not enough. He wants me to touch him. I kiss him, right above his line of pubic hair, working my way back up.

"Please Charlie; I'm so hard right now."

"I know," I whisper in to his neck.

I press my body to his, feeling his stiff just above mine. He moans at the feel of my body.

"Please touch me," He begs, staring down at me.

I grin and shake my head.

"It's my turn now," I whisper to him, "make me moan".

Alex tangles his fingers in my soaking hair, pulling my face to his in a mind blowing kiss. My lips tremble as our tongues explore each other. I need him to touch me. I want him to show me what I showed him.

As if he hears my thoughts, Alex travels town my body with his hisses, making me harder the lower he goes.

He doesn't stop at my dick. He goes lower, kissing at my inner thigh. I let out a soft moan. Feeling him so close to my penis; I want him to touch me.

"Alex," I gasp.

He grins at me. He waits a few seconds, watching me squirm with anticipation and wanting. Suddenly he brings my dick fully into his mouth, pulling it in and out. I gasp and moan, growing weaker with intensity of his pleasure.

I tremble as I reach my climax.

"Alex," I gasp again, "Alex, I'm going to cum."

He doesn't stop his work to please me. His mouth keeps gliding over my cock. Right when I am about to release, Alex lightly nibbles on my head. The sensation makes my moan, throwing my head back in pleasure. I peak my orgasm in to Alex's mouth. He swallows it, happily.

I drop to my knees, weakened with intense pleasure.

"Since you're down here..., "Alex grabs my neck, pulling me on top of him. I lean down so our lips can meet. This kiss is gentler than the ones before it; more loving. Alex pulls away, resting his head on the floor of the tub. I lay on top of him, nestling my head in the crook of his neck, breathing heavy. The now cold water beats down on my back. I close my eyes, letting it paint a rhythm on my spine.

"Alex?"

"Hmmm?" He hums in reply.

I feel the noise reverberate through his chest.

"How long have you wanted to do this to me?"

"Ever sense the day I suggested we live together."

"Can I ask you something?"

"Anything."

I lift my head to look in to his eyes, "Why did you wait so bloody long?"

He grins at me.

"Honestly, Charlie, I thought I would never get away with it…"

"Well you did."

"I guess I did."

I reach up and turn off the faucet. The water stops abruptly. I stare in to Alex's calm, brown eyes.

"I love you, Alex."

"I love you too."

We lean in to kiss again. I savor the moment, briefly, before standing up. I step out of the bath tub. Alex sits up. I stare at him, smiling.

"Put some cloths on, you oaf," I laugh at him.

He stands up and steps in front of me.

"_You first,"_ He challenges.

I grin before shoving a towel at him.

"I'm serious."

"So you can take them off later, I hope."

"Alex," my tone is more serious now, "I don't want this to be just sex, understand? I said I love you and I mean it. I want to be with you. I want to know that I'm more than a shag to you."

"Of course you are, Charlie. You're my best mate. You mean everything to me."

Charlie smiles at this.

"Take me out?"

"Of course."

"Get dressed."

Alex ties the towel around his waist and walks to his bedroom. I do the same. I can't help but think of Alex as I pull cloths across my cold skin. I feel happier than I have ever been. "Just gay," I thought to myself. I giggled at this.

"Something funny?" Alex questions, leaning in my open door frame.

"Nothing," I reply, yanking a shirt over my head.

"Ready?"

"All my life," I reply, cheesily.

He grins, holding my hand in his, as he pulls me down the hall and out the door.


	2. Chapter 2

Alex's POV:

"Ready?" I question my waiting boyfriend.

"All my life," He answers, love struck.

I grin down at him, kissing him on the lips, quickly and lightly.

"It's cold. You should grab a jacket," I say to him, taking my own off the hook by the door.

"When is it not cold in London?" Charlie chuckles in reply.

He stands next to me, coat in hand. We walk down the hall way and out the door. We step outside, our hands entwining. We travel down 3 flights of stairs from our 4th story flat. I can't help but smile as a soft wind blows through Charlie's hair.

"Do I have something on my face?" He asks me, self consciously.

"No," I chuckle.

I lean down to kiss his cheek, softly.

"But now you do."

His cheek turns a soft shade of pink where my lips had grazed it. He turns away from my gaze, looking forward again.  
>"Where are we going?"<p>

"You'll see," I answer, ominously, pulling him left, down the sidewalk.

He smiles at this, nervousness washing away.

We travel in silence for a while until I turn down a back street.

"I've never been to this part of London before," Charlie states, cautiously.

He notes the large houses, "So fancy…"

"Trust me, there's the great place."

We near a corner, a smile brightens my features.

"Here we are."

I stop him in front of a swanky bar, named "The veneur royal".

"I repeat, 'fancy'."

"Don't worry, I know the owner. She'll get us a great table."

"And when you say '_know' _her…"

"Don't worry, Charlie, she'll leave you alone. She broke up with me."

"Alex, you ladies man."

"That's what they call me."

I grin before pulling Charlie forward and in to the Café.

"Good day" The red headed waitress greets, before Charlie can argue.

He straitens up and greets her with a nervous hello.

I take over for Charlie, putting on my best fake smile, "We are friends of Annett. Do you think she could seat us?"

"Of course," The waitress replies, her fake smile not quite up to par with mine.

She turns away and walks to the back of the restaurant, her heels clicking.

"Are you sure this is going to be okay?" Charlie asks, nervously.

"Of course it is," I reassure him, "don't worry about it. She's very nice."

Charlie makes a questionable noise in his throat. I bite my bottom lip, holding back a smirk. He is so cute when he's nervous.

I stroke his hand with my thumb. He seems to calm down a bit.

A minute later, a tall, super model blonde comes strutting towards us, a confident smile on her face, and eyes on me.

"Is that her?" Charlie whispers to me.

"Alex, so good to see you again," She greets me, before I can answer.

I can't tell if she's acting or not.

"Who's your friend?"

"This is my flat mate, Charlie."

"Oh yeah, I've heard of you, Your that guy on You tube, right?"

"That's me," Charlie acknowledges, nervously.

"Would you mind seating us a table, honey?"

She grins at the term.

"Of course," She beams, "anything for you, darling."

I just nod, trying to keep my smile. She turns to lead us to the best table in the house.

"Honey?" Charlie questions, defensively.

"Best to lay it on thick. Things would be tense with out a little flirting," I whisper in reply.

He merely nods at me, walking ahead and taking a seat in the booth. I settle next to him.

"Thank you, Annett, "I say, dismissively. She gives me a curt smile and walks away.

Once she leaves, I scoot closer to Charlie so our thighs are touching. I hear his breathing quicken. I place a hand lightly on his knee as I look over the menu. He tries to do the same but rather than reading I catch him throwing glances at me.

I smile, reading over the options and my fingers slowly crawl up his leg. He squirms but doesn't say no.

I have trouble deciding what I want as my fingers toy with the buttons of Charlie's trousers. I can feel him harden, slightly from the touch. My own cock presses against the confines of my jeans. I pull my hand around to the small of his back, not wanting to make a scene. Charlie sits forward, slightly, welcoming my arm behind him.

"What are you getting, Charlie?"

"I can't decide," He lies, trying to focus again on the menu.

"I think I'm going to get the duck"

As if by magic, Annett appears again, a pad of paper and a pencil in her delicate hands.

"What can I get you boys?"

"I think I will have the Mushroom ravioli, please," Charlie answers, quietly.

Annett smiles, writing it down, quickly, "good choice. Alex?"

"The duck, please."

"Of course," She smiles again, "Anything to drink?"

"A beer"

"Two beers," Charlie corrects.

"House brew?"

"Yes please."

"Alright, that should be ready for you in no time," She picks up our menus before walking away, toward the kitchen.

"She seems nice," Charlie comments.

"I told you."

My hand wanders up his spine and to his neck, resting on his shoulder.

"Thank you for taking me here," he continues, the heat between us growing.

"Any time," we gravitate closer.

I pull his neck up so his lips can meet mine. He kisses me back, passionately.

He pulls away, "I need to use the lue.'

"Me too," I say, hurriedly.

We both stand up quickly, drawing more attention to ourselves. I attempt to act natural as I follow Charlie to the bathroom.

I try not to look at Charlie's penis as he pulls it out. I do the same. We both stand there, waiting.

I finish and go to wash my hands. Charlie follows in silence. I turn off the faucet and turn to him. He steps towards me.

"Charlie," I step even closer to him.

"Alex," He closes the distance.

I lean in to kiss him, hard. Charlie grabs at my cloths, pulling me closer. I slip my tongue in to his mouth. He welcomes it. We stand there for a few minutes, lost in each other, before I pull away, breathing hard.

"I want you," I pant.

"Haven't you had enough for today?" Charlie teases.

"I can never have enough Charlie," I pull him in to another kiss.

He turns, ramming me against the wall. My hands wander down his back, one on the small of his back, the other sliding in to his back pocket. He moans as I touch his butt. I pull him closer so his body is pressed to mine. I gasp as Charlie's hands wander in to the back of my trousers. He gropes my ass, causing me to bite down on his bottom lip. He takes the opportunity to slide his tongue in to my mouth. I welcome him, letting him explore it. I am still breathing hard when Charlie pulls away from my mouth, wandering down my neck. He trails to my neckline, one of his hands sliding up underneath my shirt, tickling my spine. I arch forward, only bringing my hips closer to his. I can feel our hard dicks rub against each other. This touch makes me thirsty with lust. I take one of my hands and rest it on the bulge in Charlie's pants. He moans with pleasure, wishing I could touch him closer.

"Alex," he moans, breathless, "not here."

I nod, pushing him away. He backs up, trying to cool himself off. I stay pressed against the wall, breathing hard. I turn to face the mirror. I turn the sink on and run my hands through the cool water. This helps calm me down a bit. I run my dampened fingers through my hair, smoothing it out.

I turn to Charlie, "You good?"

He nods. His lips are swollen red and his hair is flipped out everywhere. I chuckle briefly, reaching out to smooth his mane. He smiles at me, sweetly.

"Thanks," He says, softly, a light pink still coloring his cheeks.

I grin back at him; taking his hand and leading him back out to the restaurant. Our food is waiting for us, obediently when we return. I secretly wonder just how long we had taken in there.

We sit and begin to eat the meal, our hands wondering towards each other every now and then. Charlie eats slowly, taking in the high class bistro, surrounding him.

The walls of the room they were seated in were painted a bright yet subtle red on the top half. Orange tiles lined the bottom half. The room was furnished with round, dark stained, oak tables, Fuzzy orange booths and matching chairs. Each table had a small crystal chandelier hanging above it. Through a window in the wall you could see the bar area. The walls were painted a baby blue. A very nice contrast. You could tell it was designed by a woman, No man would be able to match those colors so perfectly with out them clashing. The drink counter was 1 ½ meters tall, made of stainless steel. The counter top was paved with tiles the same color as the walls. There are stainless steel stools lining the bar with white cushions on them. A tall, short haired man stands behind it, polishing glasses and flirting with costumers while waitresses make and serve drinks.

I take the moment to admire Charlie as he inspects the café. He eventually turns back to me, blushing slightly.

"Was I zoning out?"

"Just a bit," I chuckle, "I was enjoying the view."

"How much did this meal cost?"

"About 100 quid."

His blush deepens, "Well, we better eat it then…"

I nod, turning back to my food.

We finish the meal in silence before Annett returns to our table.

"How you guys doing? All done?"

"Yes," we both mummer back, handing her our plates.

"Any room for desert?"

"No," we reply unanimously

"All right then, I'll go ahead and put these in the kitchen."

"How much?" I question, reaching in my back pocket for my wallet.

"On the house," She replies, grinning at me.

"Are you sure?" I say, sitting back down.

"Positive. Thanks for introducing me," she winks at Charlie who looks away, blushing again.

She walks away with our dishes. I turn to Charlie. He smiles at me, his adorable face painted red. I can't help but smile at him.

"Oh and Alex?" Annett projects from her position in front of the kitchen door, "I want an invitation to the wedding."

She laughs at us as I feel my face getting hot. She disappears through the door and everyone in the room is staring at us. I turn to Charlie who is redder than I have ever seen him.

"Time to go then?" I suggest.

"Yep." He concures, getting up and hurrying out of the room.

I follow him, closely, hiding my head under my hood. Charlie does the same.

"Thank you very much," I manage to say to the waitress as we pass.

I get outside and Charlie is waiting for me. I smile at him, apologetically. I lead the way home and we walk in silence.

"Here we are," I state, as we reach our building.

"Have you ever thought about it?" Charlie questions, out of no where.

"Thought about what?" I ask in return.

"Getting married."

I laugh at him, walking ahead towards the stairs, "It's our first date, Charlie."

"I'm not saying right now..," he replies, defensively.

I look back at him, realizing he hasn't moved.

"Well, yeah, I guess it could, maybe one day, be a possibility."

He nods, satisfied, before following me back up to that flat.

"Cup of tea?" I offer once we get back inside.

"Please," he removes his jacket and hangs it on the hook next to mine.

I head to the kitchen to start the kettle and Charlie flops down on the couch.

Once the water is ready I pour it into two mugs and place tea bags in them. I walk up behind Charlie and wrap an arm across his neck, handing him his tea.

"Here you go, love."

He smiles up at me, "Thanks, Alex."

He grabs the mug and sets it on the table. I place mine next to his, sitting beside him. Charlie kisses me on the cheek and rests his head on my shoulder. I turn to face him and rest his head on my chest, leaning back against the arm. Charlie snuggles to me, content.

"Hey Alex?"

"Hmm?" I reply, dreamily

"That was the best first date I've ever had."

I smile, my eyes drifting close.

"You're welcome Charlie."

I drift off to sleep, listening to the calm rhythm of Charlie's breath.


	3. Chapter 3

Charlie's POV:

"Hey Alex?"

"Hmm?" He replies from underneath my head.

"That was the best first date I've ever had."

"You're welcome Charlie".

"Thank you".

I take his tea and set it on the table next to mine, replacing it with my hand. I listen to Alex's breath and heartbeat slow, falling in perfect rhythm of each other. Slowly, blissfully, I fall in to sleep.

I wake up around 4 AM, still positioned on top of Alex. I couldn't imagine how that could be very comfortable. I stand up carefully, trying not to wake Alex. I stretch out my limbs, noisily. I was wonderfully stiff from my romantic slumber on the couch. I take a large swig of the cold tea resting on the table to sooth my dry thought. I move to leave the room when a hand grabs at my leg. I almost drop the mug in surprise.

"Don't leave me," comes Alex's hoarse morning voice.

"Why don't you come with me?" I turn round to face him, "There is no way I am going to fit comfortably back on that couch."

Alex keeps pawing at me, his eyes half closed.

"Carry me?"

"I don't think so. Come on," I pull at his arm, trying to get him up. It flops back down, lazily.

"Fine, I'll just go lay in my bed…. All alone…. Naked and cold…. With no one to snuggle."

"Look at that, I'm awake," Alex yawns, sitting up.

I shake my head at him. He walks to my bedroom groggily and flops down on my bed. I follow him. I take another sip of cold tea before joining him in my bed. The cool cloth feels nice underneath my skin. The comfort is short lived.

"What is this?" Alex squeaks.

I turn round to face him. "What is what, Alex?"

"You said you were going to sleep naked!"

"Goodnight Alex". I turn round again, closing my eyes.

A few seconds pass in piece before I am blocked from sleep once again.

"Hey, Charlie?"

I sigh, "Yes Alex?"

"I'm cold."

I flop over on to my back and snuggle close to Alex.

"Is that better?"

"You're still wearing cloths, Charlie".

"Good night, Alex".

"Good night."

I woke up again, this time to a sunny bedroom. My bed was empty. Alex's scent still lingered. I heard the sound of a shower coming from my bath room.

I sit up, "Really, Alex? You had to use my shower?"

I suddenly remembered everything that had happened in that bathroom only yesterday. I had lost my virginity to a man. And not just any man but, Alex Day. The man I had thought to be my best friend all of these years. The man I had bought a flat with. The man I had shared every thing with for so long and had never known my secret fantasies could ever become reality.

What would people think once they knew? Charlie McDonnell; gay. Would they be surprised? Repulsed? Or could they have seen it coming all along? What about my mum? She said she would always love me no matter what, but would she really? What about my brother and sister? What about Alex's family? What about our friends?

What was so wrong about being gay anyway? I had always been a big supported of equality. I had never understood how a male person was any different from a female person. Who cared what they had in their pants as long as you liked their personality? Or was gender really a defining factor? Am I really gay or is it just Alex? What happens if things don't work out between us? What then?

I have too many questions. I need to do something to make my brain shut up.

I hear the shower turn off from the other side of the door. I stand up to stretch. I take off my shirt and pants and throw them in my dirty cloths pile. I knock on the bathroom door.

"Hey, Alex? Can I come in and brush my teeth please?"

"Yeah, that's fine, Charlie, come on in," he opens the door for me.

He is soaking wet and very naked.

"Hello!" I exclaim as he reveals his body to me.

"Hi, yeah, there are no towels in here. I figured you wouldn't mind the view," he gives me a little wink.

"Yeah, whatever, I don't mind," I push past him to the sink.

Rather than leaving, he turns around to face my back.

"Charlie, are you cross at me for some reason? Have I upset you?"

I wipe the steam from the mirror, not looking back to face him.

"No, Alex, I'm fine. Just don't expect us to have hot crazy sex all the time, okay? Sometimes I just want to be able to be around you and not get a hard on. Is that alright with you?"

"I'm going to go get dressed".

Alex walks out of my bedroom in silence. I sigh, letting my head loose. It makes a light "thunk" as it hit's the mirror.

"What am I going to do?" I mutter to myself, "What am I going to do?"


	4. Chapter 4

Alex's POV:

I turn off the water and step out of the shower. There is a light knock on the door.

"Hey, Alex? Can I come in and brush my teeth please?"

"Yeah, that's fine, Charlie, come on in,"

"Hello!" He exclaims as I open the door.

"Hi, yeah, there are no towels in here. I figured you wouldn't mind the view," I give him a wink.

"Yeah, whatever, I don't mind," he pushes past me to the sink.

Something was bothering him. I turn round to face him but his back is to me.

"Charlie, are you cross at me for some reason? Have I upset you?"

He doesn't look at me. He just wipes the mirror so he can see my face.

"No, Alex, I'm fine. Just don't expect us to have hot crazy sex all the time, okay?"

His words stung. I nod, solemnly, not knowing what to say. I had obviously done something to upset him.

"Sometimes I just want to be able to be around you and not get a hard on. Is that alright with you?"

"Of course that's alright, Charlie. I love you. Everything will be fine, That's what I wanted to say, but I didn't.

I wanted to hold him in my arms and tell him everything was going to be alright. He was looking at my body with those cold, hurt eyes. I couldn't stand it anymore. I had to leave.

"I'm going to go get dressed," I say, finally.

I leave the room, hurriedly. I proceed to my bedroom robotically, closing the door and putting on the first cloths I can get my hands on, not caring what they are. I sit down, blankly. I stare at my bedroom door for a few minutes before I release my mind.

What is wrong with Charlie? Is it me? Is he upset that we had sex? I hadn't even thought about him at the time. He didn't say no. I figured he wanted it….

I thunk my head against the wall. I'm so stupid! Of course that's why he's upset! He was a virgin and I took that from him without even asking. I have to talk to him. I have to apologize.

I stand up and walk out of my room and in to the hallway.

"Charlie?"

No response.

I walk in to his bedroom and look around. No sign of him.

"Charlie?"

Still no response.

I look in the kitchen and the living room. Still nothing. He left.

I go back in to my room and pick up my phone. I call him.

His cell phone rings, piercing the silence. I follow the sound back to his room. It is laying on his bed.

I disconnect the call and shove my phone in my pocket, getting worried. I put a coat on and walk outside. I fly down the stairs.

"Charlie?" I call out.

Still no answer.

I reach the street. I look up and down but there is no sign of him.

Suddenly, something whizzes past my head and hit's the ground making a light "ping". I pick it up. It's a two pence coin. I look up to its origin and see Charlie. He is standing on the edge of the building, looking strait ahead.

"Shit," I hiss, running for the stairs again.

"Charlie!" I scream as I reach the roof top.

He is still there. Staring straight ahead.

I walk up behind him, "Charlie, don't do this, please! It's only ten levels high, it won't kill you. It'll only break my heart."

He doesn't move or speak.

"Listen, Charlie, I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to rush you in to all of this. I really love you and I just want this to work out."

"Doesn't it bug you?"

I smile. At least I was getting to him. As long as he talked to me, as long as I could convince him to stay, things might work out.

"What, Charlie?"

He turns around to face me, his face covered in tears, his eyes blood shot.

"That we live in a world where death seems like the only answer. That we are surrounded by people so incompetent, so judgmental, that we can't bear to be different."

I step closer to him and take him in my arms.

"Come here, Charlie. Everything's going to be alright, I promise. We have friends and family that love us. That is never going to change no matter what we do, and I love you, Charlie. That's all that matters. Being with someone you love and being with someone that loves you."

Charlie shakes in my arms as his tears soak through my shirt. I hold him and try to comfort him as he cries. We stand there for a few hours, not saying anything. Charlie has stopped crying by now and we are just holding each other.

"I'm sorry, Alex," he says to me finally.

I step back slightly so I can see his face, "Why?"

"For scaring you, for over reacting…"

"You didn't over react Charlie. I'm just glad you didn't jump."

"I love you".

I smile at him, "I love you too, Charlie".

He reaches up to kiss me on the lips.

"You want to go inside?" I ask once our lips have parted.

He nods. I take his hand and lead him down the stairs and in to our apartment once again.


	5. Chapter 5

Charlie's POV:

"Here," Alex's voice breaks my concentration on the carpet.

He is waving a green mug in from of my face. Stream rises out of it and the smell of tea tickles my nostrils.

"Thank you," I smile at him, taking the mug.

"No problem," he plops down next to me on the couch.

I lean on him, lazily.

"You tired, Charlie?"

"A little," I reply with a yawn. I didn't get a whole lot of sleep last night.

"I know," he retorts with a soft chuckle.

There is a welcomed silence as I sip at my tea. This was nice. Just sitting here with Alex. This is all that really matters. Right now; being with someone I love and being with someone who loves me.

Alex's hand begins to run through my hair. I close my eyes, curling up in to his embrace. For the first time I really feel like this is where I belong. Here, with Alex, right now, and forever.

When I wake up I am alone in my bed. I glance at my alarm clock. It is 1:30 PM. Damn, I slept a long while. I get out of bed and stretch. I hear the gentle strumming of Alex's guitar coming from within the closed doors of his bedroom. I knock on his door. The strumming stops abruptly.

"Yeah, Charlie?"

"I was wondering if I could come listen to you play"

"Uh, I don't know. I'm kind of in the middle of writing a new song. It's not really… Presentable yet".

"Alright. That's fine. I'll leave you to it, then".

I retreat back to my room. Alex was always very possessive when it came to his music. It was a part of him. He put every piece of his soul in to it and them some. He always wanted it to be perfect before he showed anyone. Even when it was tweaked to near perfection, he still dogged himself, saying it needed so much more work.

I might as well try to think of video ideas. I mean, it technically is my job and I haven't posted one in a few weeks. I take a seat at my desk. I fish a piece of paper and a pencil out of the drawer to my left and think.

After a few minutes of solid blank, I turn on Mr. Shiny: My Desktop Mac. I spend several hours checking my email, reading blogs, watching You tube videos, checking my twitter feed, goofing around on Tumblr, pretty much anything but my job. At about 5 PM I give up and lean back in my chair. I was too hungry and lost for ideas to focus anymore of the trivial tasks of social networking sites.

I remove myself from my desk in exasperation. I work my way to the kitchen in darkening light of the apartment. I whistle to myself mindlessly as I rummage through the ice box. I pull out everything that looks edible. I grab a spoon and head to the living room. With the lights off, I hadn't noticed Alex sitting down, silently reading a book. I plop down next to him. He looks up from his book to smile at me.

"Hello, Charlie," he greats me.

"Hey," I answer, "Sorry to intrude. I didn't realize you were sitting here".

"I don't mind," he smiles at me, "I wanted to talk to you anyway".

"Oh?" I question, putting a spoonful of yogurt in to my mouth.

"Yeah, and don't feel pressured. I was just wondering, after what happened this morning, how long you want us to be a secret. I mean, we can take as long as you need, its fine with me, and if you don't want me to tell anyone I won't".

"Oh," I say, thinking about it.

I recall the events of this morning. I hadn't even really been thinking when I decided to jump. It was probably the most selfish thing I could have done in that situation. I didn't thank about how it would affect Alex or my family, my friends, hell, even my fans. I had just decided it. What was I ashamed of, anyway? I am Charlie McDonnell and I'm a bloody gay! Since when have I ever cared what other people thought? Telling Alex to keep it a secret was pretty much the same thing as telling him I was ashamed of who we are. What was there to hide? I am me and he is him. Nothing has changed. If someone thinks it has then they can deal with it.

"You know what?" I say after a minute, "You can tell who you want. I'm proud of whom I am and what I am is in love with you".

Alex leans over to kiss me on the lips. A quick warmness spread throughout my body, leaving me grinning.

"Thank you," I compliment after our lips part.

"Thank you, Mr., McDonnell, for being the most amazing boyfriend I have ever had.

"I'm the only boyfriend you've ever had," I mumble, bashfully.

He takes a few moments to admire me and all of the glory I apparently process. Finally, I decide to change the subject.

"I tried to come up with a few video ideas today but I got nothing".

"Why not come out?"

"I think it's a bit too soon for that…." I trail off, nervously.

Sure, I had self pride and everything. I would be happy to admit it to anyone who asked but You tube? Anyone in the world could see that…

"I understand," he says affectionately.

The conversation ended there but the idea stuck in my brain. What if I did come out to the world? Would it really be that bad?


	6. Chapter 6

Hello! Little note from the author here, before we get going! I'm really sorry it's been so long since the last entry. You guys have been more than kind in supporting me in this process. Finally! A new chapter for you to sink your teeth in to. I'll try and make it as long and juicy as possible. I'll also be writing quite a bit in the next three weeks whether it's for this story or something else so stay tuned for that. This will be the only announcement. Happy Hunger Games and May the odds be ever in your favor.

Wrong fandom?

Charlie's POV:

I sit down in front of my camera for the 5th time today. "Just do it, Charlie, I mutter to myself. "Just do it".

I turn the camera on and stare at it for a few seconds before I speak.

"Hello. I'm just a little nervous today because I have a … something that I need to tell you… I have a secret, basically, that I've been keeping from you for quite a while… It is going to change the way you perceive me for, you know, ever, but I think that we have known each other for a while now and we are at the stage in our relationship where I.. I just have to be honest with you…"

I pause for quite a while. I start thinking of all the ways I could tell them with out really telling them. I could cover it up. Come out of the closet as something else… A robot. It would make so much sense. My monotone, my jump cut style, I could make a whole video about it. Explain to Alex, I flaked out, he would understand, especially since I got a good video idea out of it.

I pull out a pad of paper and begin to storyboard. After a few hours of brain storm action, some Alex action, and a snack, I turn on the camera, and start again, with new found confidence.

"Hello. I'm just a little nervous today because I have a something, that I need to tell you. I have a secret, basically, that I've been keeping from you for quite a while. It is going to change the way you perceive me for, you know, ever, but I think that we have known each other for a while now and we are at the stage in our relationship where I.. I just have to be honest with you. Well that and I really don't have any choice in the matter to be honest. In fact I don't really have any notions about what choice really is. I just do what I'm told. Busily… I am… And have always been…. A robot".

I turn off the camera and load in the footage to Mr. Shiny. Once it's loaded I pull it in to Final Cut and take a look at them. The first four clips are of me seriously coming out of the closet. I watch them with intent as I choke out the word "Homosexual" or "gay" in each one. I go on to explain how I'm proud, or confused, or terrified. It's hard. It's really hard. Men can live all their lives, knowing, and never tell a soul, especially not their wives and children. Suddenly, an idea hits me.

I spend hours editing, the glowing screen of my monitor illuminating my face. I constantly watch my new creation form, changing small things until it is up to par. My true coming out story. A raw and beautiful piece of work with real emotion. Maybe one of the best videos to ever see the light of my channel but never to be viewed by its subscribers.

I send it to You tube as a private video. That's when I really knew who I was doing this for. Me. This is who I am. Who cares who knows, as long as I do?

I showed it to Alex later.

"I'm really proud of you, Charlie," he says to me, his hand resting on my back, "this is the first step".

"I couldn't have done it without you," I say, turning around in my chair to face him.

He is crouched over me like a cave. I Wrap my arms around his waist as I stand, drawing my body closer to his. He holds me and kisses the top of my head.

"It's just about time for bed, Charlie. It's getting late and you've been working really hard today".

I pull away so he can see my grin.

"I'm not quite ready to go to sleep yet. Plus I've been sitting down all day, I need some exercise".

"Oh," Alex replies, eyebrows raised, catching my innuendo.

I sit down on the bed, pulling him to me. He straddles my legs. I pull off his tee-shirt in one quick movement. He returns the favor, shortly; we spend a few seconds just to admire the shirtless bodies in front of ourselves. Now his lips are on mine, smooth and gentle. My fingers find their way to the crook of his spine, pulling him closer to me. I begin to lie back on the bed as Alex pulls himself on top of me. His light and gentle kisses proceed down my neck and chest. My breath becomes short. His lips travel so lightly, barely leaving my skin before meeting it again in a gentle kiss. By the time he reaches the line of my trousers, I am blinded with lust. My fingers tangle in to his hair, begging his mouth to touch my cock.

His long fingers work delicately as he undoes the buttons on my jeans. He pulls them off in one great motion, discarding them to the floor. When he returns, he is full on me, again, his lips on mine. As good of a kisser, as he was, I couldn't help wishing they were somewhere else.

Alex proceeds to lightly nibble on my earlobe.

"Do you want to try something new?" The words escape his lips in little more then a whisper.

I couldn't help a small whimper as his seductive tone reached straight for my groin.

"Try me," I finally managed to spit out.

Alex became visibly more aggressive, his eyes hungry. His lips met with my skin, again, this time, joined by teeth. I can feel a small bruise forming on my shoulder. His nails rake down my sides, his fingers curling around my hips. He proceeds to flip me over. A sudden twinge of fear runs through my spine.

I don't feel the warmth of his skin against mine. All I hear is a rustling of fabric, then his cold fingers removing my boxer-briefs. In one quick movement his lips are at my ear again.

"It's my first time, so I'm sorry if I hurt you. I'll try to be gentle".

There is some more rustling and then footsteps. I roll over to see an empty room.

"That was fast," I retort, sarcastically.

Alex returns shortly, holding a small bottle.

"Sorry about that. You caught me off guard. I didn't come prepared".

I stand up in front of him, "Oh yeah? Are you prepared for this?"

I wrap my arms around his neck, pulling myself up and mounting at his waist, skin contact was slightly uncomfortable but I was shortly distracted by a wrestling match with Alex's tongue. We kissed with primal passion, our hands, groping at each other trying to draw each other closer. Eventually, we toppled to the bed.

Our hands still grasped at each the hungrily. Alex stopped for a moment, fiddling with the small bottle that had gotten lost some time ago. My hips buckled as his fingers entered me. My entire body tensed, first with pain, then with pleasure. His fingers slide back and forth, in and out, inside of me. A scream escapes me lips when he enters me with his own cock. So much pain mixed with sweet and salty pleasure. It felt good more than it felt bad. He glided in and out of me, slowly and gently, each movement, joined by a noise escaping my mouth. The pillow in my face was wet from sweat and tears. My screams were still loud enough to disturb the neighbors. I tried to be quieter but with every pounding motion of Alex's penis, a new wave a pain and pleasure induced a loud moan to escape me. Alex's grunts and moans harmonized with mine.

"Charlie, I can't hold on much longer," He panted.

The growing pressure in my groin told me the same thing. All I could do was gasp in return.

I arch my back in to him. His thrusts become faster and deeper, each time, his ball hitting my butt cheeks. My moans are no longer controllable. I burry my face in the pillow in front of me, my high pitched squeals far from dignified. I feel Alex's cum fill up with in me. The sensation is so great. My own seed spills out on to the sheets below me. Alex's limp body collapses on top of mine. Our breath is heavy and quick.

He takes a moment before rolling off of me, on to his back. I look at him, bathing in afterglow. His body shines with sweat, his chest heaving up in down with his slowing breath. His lips are red and swollen, His eyelids are heavy, his hair a tangled mess. The sight of him makes me want to go all over again.

He catches me staring at him, "What?"

"You're so beautiful," I answer him.

I can't take my eyes off of his naked body.

He hmmphed in way of answer, folding over to pull me in towards his chest. We stayed that way for quite a while, just holding each other, enjoyed the fond memories of the events that have just occurred. I don't know how long I lay there, listening to Alex's heart beat, before I fell asleep. I woke up to the same sight of Alex, no peacefully asleep. I smiled at the sight, watching for a little while before getting up. My body creaks with stiffness. My limbs are sore. I find quite a few surprise bruises as I wash my body in the shower. I cherish them, knowing the memories that come with them. We probably won't be doing this for a while. Not until we've learned to control ourselves. I'm not sure how much of this my body can take.

I finish washing and step out of the shower. When I come out of the bathroom, Alex is still asleep in my bed. I smile at him. I dig in my drawer for a clean pair of knickers and slide them on. I shut the door of my bedroom, so as not to wake him. I then proceed to the kitchen to make breakfast. Our fridge isn't the most supplied in the world but there are eggs. I decided to avoid the bacon, considering it was admitting a strange smell. I shove some bread in to the toaster and begin to fry the eggs. When the eggs are finished I slide two on each plate, adding salt and pepper to Alex's and Tabasco to mine. I then add some strawberry jam to the toast and slide a piece on each plate. I stare at it a moment before picking up the plates and proceeding back to my bedroom. Alex is just sitting up.

"Good morning, Charlie," he greets me with a smile.

"I brought you some breakfast," I say to him, sliding his plate on to the bedside table next to him.

It was just then I realized I had forgotten forks.

"I'll be right back," I state, rushing to go retrieve eating utensils.

I hand one to him when I return. He sets down the toast he had been munching on and takes the fork from me with a thankful smile. I silently wonder what Alex is thinking as he quietly eats his eggs.

"I came up with a video idea," I say, breaking the silence.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah. It's about a Charliebot. It will be a whole video explaining that I'm really a robot and not a person. I made up a whole story board. I'll show it to you later, if you like. I think I may need your help for some of it".

"Alright, that sounds cool. I'll check it out".

He glances over to the clock on my bedside table.

"I've got a meeting with Tom in a little while, them I'm all yours".

"Alright," I give him a smile.

He finishes his breakfast and sets the fork down on the plate with a clank. He sits there for a bit before standing up. He stretches out his arms with a little yawn.

"I best be getting some cloths on," he says, moving to leave the room.

"If you insist," I say, enjoying the view.

"Well, I can't exactly meet Tom like this, can I?"

"I guess not," I say with a laugh.

He goes on to his bedroom. He returns a few minutes later, fully dressed.

"I guess I'll be heading out now, Charlie. I'll see you later".

"Alright then," I smile at him.

He returns the smile before turning to leave. I get dressed and begin to plan and film more scenes for my Charliebot video.


	7. Chapter 7

Alex's POV:

I grab my jacket and keys on the way out the door. Once I hit the street I call Tom to let him know I'm on my way.

"Hello?"

"Hey Tom, its Alex. I just wanted to let you know I'm on my way to the studio right now".

There is a short silence and some rustling on the other end of the line.

"Right, yeah, I almost forgot. I'll be on my way in a few minutes. I'll see you then"

Tom is quite a scatter brained, forgetful person, but something seemed off, even for him.

"Okay, see you then," I answer.

The line went dead. Just like that. There was no cute 'Alright! Bye!' like usual. Something is definitely off about Tom. I guess I'll find out when I see him.

I slide my Iphone back in to the pocket of my hoodie and continue to make my way to the recording studio. I get there before Tom and wait for him inside the room we've rented. A few minutes later he comes crashing in, his arms stretched around a bass drum.

"Hello," he greets hurriedly, "Sorry I'm late".

I greet him with a smile, "I'm just glad you made it".

"Yeah!" he sets the drum down on the ground. "Yeah," he repeats, staring off.

I watch him, "Are you feeling alright?"

"Yeah! Sure! Of course!" he answers, nervously.

I grab his shoulder and stare in to his eyes, "Tom".

He pulls away from me, turning to fiddle with things, "we better get started if you want to get any work done!"

His awkward laugh set my teeth on edge. I hate this. I know something's wrong but he won't let me help.

"Right then," I state evenly, trying to play along like everything's alright.

I step in to the booth. We were recording and tweaking for a little over an hour. Tom seems a little out of it but he was operating his equipment normally so I'm not too bothered. He kept hanging around after we were done, gathering his things slowly as I text Charlie.

"Have you got a place to be?" I ask him.

It's very obvious he was waiting for me to ask.

"No not particularly," he answered his face lighting up, despite his passive tone.

"Want to grab a bite?"

"Sure," he flashes a smile at me.

He was beginning to warm up to be more like his normal self once the evening went on. We must have been sitting in the restaurant for hours, just talking. There is an air to him like he'd rather be here than anywhere else. No, like he felt _safer here than anywhere else. There is something seriously wrong but I just don't know what._

_Tom reaches his hand up to run his fingers through his hair. That's when I saw it. There was bruising on his arm. I reach over and grab his wrist._

"_Who did this?" I demand._

"_Listen, Alex, it's really not that big of a deal-"_

"_Did Kathrin do this? Are you still seeing her?"_

"_Maybe… Anyway, it's no business of yours"._

"_You know, what a lot of people don't know, is that women can be abusive too. And she is Tom! Don't you remember what happened last time? You said you were going to stay away from her"._

"_She said it would be different this time"._

"_Well it obviously isn't"._

_I had forgotten I was still holding his wrist until he moved to stand up. I finally let go of him. He leaves the restaurant with a huff. I dig in to my wallet and throw some crumpled notes on the table in an amount I mindlessly hope ads up to the total. I shove my wallet back in to my trousers, already half way to the door. I rush out the door and in to the dim streets of London. Tom is nowhere to be seen, lost in the twilight. I let out a sigh and start on my way home. _


	8. Chapter 8

Charlie's POV:

It was several hours before Alex came back home. I didn't really pay mind to the extent of the visit. They were probably recording. That's quite a long process. Also, I had been filming so time had passed quite quickly.

Alex came behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist.

"Anything I can do to help?" he asks, before kissing me on the cheek.

"Yeah," I reply "I've got all of the scenes scripted out," I hand him a thin packet of typed pages.

"You can go over it tonight and we'll film it tomorrow. Alright?"

Alex stares at the packet blankly, "Alright," he says, his voice distant.

"Are you feeling okay?" I ask.

"Yeah, fine," he answers.

He returns his gaze to mine, finally, and forces a smile. His eyes give away that his mind is somewhere else.

"Did something happen with Tom?" I am starting to get a bit worried now.

"Yeah," long pause followed.

I was beginning to think he wasn't going to answer when he said, "He's back with Kathrin".

"He's what?"

"I know".

"What has that psycho bitch done now?"

"I'm not sure the extent. I found some bruises on his arm. He won't talk about it".

I turn away from Alex, beginning to pace, "damn it! Doesn't he know what's good for him? Does he really want a repeat of last time? He's still got that scar. He's lucky he lived. I still can't believe he wouldn't let us call the cops. Everyone would benefit if that mad woman were put behind bars".

"Well, nothing can stop us if it happens again".

"It won't happen again," I insist.

I'm not sure how long I paced back and forth, ranting on and on before I picked up my phone.

"What are you doing?"

I turn back to Alex, "what does it look like I'm doing? I'm calling Tom".

Alex steps closer to me, "I'm really not sure that's the best idea".

I set my phone down on the desk, "I guess you're right…" after quite a bit of silence, I speak up again, "Well, what do we do, then?"

"We'll go over tomorrow. Get him out of the house. As long he's with us, he won't be with her. Then, maybe, we can try to start getting her away for good".

"Alright," I say my mind temporarily preoccupied with thoughts.

Eventually I wonder over to the bed and lie down. A few moments after the last bit of light has been sucked from my room, Alex wanders in. He goes to remove my trousers. I let him, not wanting to startle him. He drops my jeans to the floor and joins me in the bed. I continue to lie there, feeling a little more comfortable now that he is lying next to me. Eventually, I do will myself to sleep.

I'm sitting on the couch with Alex, playing Smash Brothers for the Wii. My phone rings.

I pick it up, "Hello?"

"Charlie!" comes Edd's frantic voice on the other end, "Come over right now, something's happened to Tom".

He hung up before I could ask questions.

I rush for the door, grabbing a coat and sneakers on my way out.

"What's going on?" Alex calls after me.

"Tom's in trouble".

I hear his muffled cursing and then footsteps on the stairs behind me. We make our way to Tom and Edd's house.

We arrive in the belly of chaos. Tom is writhing on the floor. His hands are groping his freshly bandaged side.

"Shit," Alex hisses, "How deep is the cut?"

"At least two centimeters," answers Edd, "all along his side"

"That won't be enough to hold him; we need to take him to the hospital".

We are bound away in the waiting room for what seems like years. Finally, a doctor comes to approach us. We stand to greet the incoming news.

"There is no internal damage. He'll heal up quite nicely. I'm afraid he'll have that scar for the rest of his life, though. Do any of you know how this happened?"

"No," Edd answers for all of us, "He just came home that way".

He didn't say what we all knew. It was Kathrin.

I wake up with a start. I peel off my shirt, sweat coating my body.

"Charlie?" comes Alex's calm voice from the dark.

"Just had a bad dream. Sorry to have woken you".

I fall back on to the bed and try to beckon sleep once more.


	9. Chapter 9

Alex's POV:

My eyelids flutter open to the sight of Charlie's chestnut hair. I snuggle closer to him, not yet ready to wake. He welcomes my body next to his. After a few minutes, Charlie pulls away.

"Hey," I protest.

"We've got work to do before we go see Tom," he explains.

"You're right," I agree, flopping over to get out of bed.

We spend the morning filming, moving at a sluggish pace. It feels nice, just to be here with Charlie, not having to worry about the world around us.

He catches me staring at him. My eyes are fixed on him, the sun shining on his face. He is so beautiful. I just want to hold him and forget the world forever.

I brush back a stray hair and tuck it behind his ear. His hand wraps around mine. I caress his cheek, lightly, before tipping up his chin and joining his lips with mine.

"Do you think we can go see Tom now?" Charlie asks me.

I nod. It's time to stop pretending; Time to stop ignoring the outside world. Our friend is in trouble, and we need to help him.

My stomach starts to growl once we hit the street.

"Do you think we could make a quick stop for some nosh?"

"Sure," Charlie replies, nonchalantly.

We stop at the corner store and leave with plastic wrapped sandwiches and cans of soda.

We eat on our way to Tom's house.

"What are we going to do?" Charlie asks, breaking the silence.

"About what?" I answer, between bites.

"Tom"

"Be his mates. I'm not sure there's anything else we can do at this point".

Charlie just nods and walks on.

I knock on the door to Tom's house. Edd answers it.

"We've come to collect Tom" I state, brightly, my best smile on.

Edd's face disappears from the doorway, and then returns shortly there after.

"He's not in," Edd states, plainly.

"When will he be back?" Charlie pipes up.

"Not sure," says Edd, scratching at his head, giving off a small yawn.

"Have we woken you?" I ask.

He nods, tiredly, "I was up late last night, had a gig all the way in Edenbrough".

"Well, thank you," I say, trying to keep the disappointment out of my voice.

"Yup," replies Edd, "have a nice day"

I turn to Charlie, the door closing not too long afterward.

"Guess we should have called first," I say apologetically.

He only nods and starts back toward our flat. I follow him in silence.

Charlie doesn't even bother to slow up for me. He just walks in iterated silence. By the time I close and lock the door, Charlie is placed on the couch, Iphone to his ear.

I ease myself on to the couch next to him.

"Hey, Tom. Yeah, I was just wondering if you wanted to do something today?… Oh. Oh, well if you say so… Yeah he's here. Sure, here you go," Charlie hands his phone to me in one swift motion.

I take it from him and press it up to my ear, "Hello?"

"Hey, Alex," comes Tom's light voice from the other end of the line, "I just wanted to apologize for last night. I shouldn't have walked out on you. But Kathrin's really better now. She's been to rehab-"

"Tom, you need to listen to me now, okay? You are one of my best mates. I will not just stand by and watch you get killed by some temptress who's got you under his spell, you understand me?"

There is a long silence. I almost think he's hung up when I hear a light rustling on the other end, and then his voice, saying, "I know after what happened last time, I should stay away. I know I should be angry, and afraid, and I shouldn't love her, but I do, Alex, I do love her and I can't stop, no matter how much it hurt, I just can't".

He choked out the last words before muffled sobs.

"I know, Tom, I know it's hard, but if you know what's best for you, you will stay away".

"That's the problem," his voice cracks, "I don't know what's best for me anymore".

There stay silent for a while, letting him cry.

"Would you like to come over?" I say, finally.

"I'll be there in an hour"

"Where are you?"

"It doesn't matter. I'll be there in an hour".

"Alright," I answer, but the line already dead.


	10. Chapter 10

Tom's POV:

The key fits in to its lock easily and the door slides open.

"Kathrin?" I call in to apartment.

There is no answer. I enter anyway, closing the door behind me. I wonder in to her bedroom. Sounds clanging come from the powder room.

"Kathrin," I poke my head in to the loo.

She closes the drawer she is digging in, with a bang. She turns to me hurriedly.

"Tom," her voice is rushed and nervous, "I didn't realize you were here".

"What are you hiding from me?" I ask, reaching in to open the drawer.

She steps closer to me, further blocking me off. I push past her and reach for the drawer, anyway.

"Don't!" she shrieks.

I pull open the drawer to reveal a stash of prescription pills. I pull one out and examine it.

"God damn it Kathrin! You said you were clean now! Who sold these to you?"

Kathrin raises her hand and slaps me across the face. Her nails sting as they tear at my flesh.

"You bastard! You absolute wanker! You get out of my house right now!"

I stand stark still for a moment, letting the blood run down my cheek. I am calm; far too calm.

"Nice talk darling," I say sarcastically.

I pull the key from its storage place in my pocket and set it down on the counter along with the bottle of pills.

"You can keep the key and your precious pills. It's obvious you love them more than me anyway".

I walk of the apartment, cool and calm. It walked, mindlessly, for several blocks before it really sinks in what I have done. I stop on the street and fall to my knees. I lie there for a while, not crying, just lying in agony. I love her. I love her more than anything.

But she doesn't love me. That's why I had to leave.

My phone buzzes in my pocket, disrupting the whirlpool of thought, swirling in my brain. I pick it up.

"Hello?

"Hey, Tom," comes Charlie's voice form the other end.

"Oh, hello Charlie. Was there something you needed?"

"Yeah, I was just wondering if you wanted to do something today."

"No, I think I would rather be alone".

"Oh. Oh, well if you say so…"

There is a short silence before I remember the stupidity that took place the night before.

"Hey, if Alex there?"

"Yeah he's here"

"May I talk to him, please? "

"Sure, here you go," there is some rustling on the other end of the line, then Alex's voice, "Hello?"

"Hey, Alex, I just wanted to apologize for last night. I shouldn't have walked out on you," the words flow from my mouth before I have a chance to think what they are, "But Kathrin's really better now. She's been to rehab-"

Why am I protecting her? She's not better.

"Tom, you need to listen to me now, okay? You are one of my best mates. I will not just stand by and watch you get killed by some temptress who's got you under her spell, you understand me?"

He cares about me. He knew Kathrin couldn't be trusted. He wanted to help me. How could I be so stupid?

Before I can think, words come tumbling out of my mouth, "I know after what happened last time, I should stay away. I know I should be angry, and afraid, and I shouldn't love her, but I do, Alex, I do love her and I can't stop, no matter how much it hurts, I just can't".

I can't hold back the tears now. They flow down my face in uneven rivers.

"I know, Tom, I know it's hard, but if you know what's best for you, you will stay away".

"That's the problem; I don't know what's best for me anymore".

Tears continue to cascade down my cheeks. I must look like a loony, heaving here on the side of the street. Who cares? My heart is broken, and god damn it, it hurts.

Alex's voice comes to me, through the darkness, "Would you like to come over?"

I need a friend, someone to talk to, some one who cares.

"I'll be there in an hour"

"Where are you?"

"It doesn't matter. I'll be there in an hour".

I hang up the phone and slide it in to my pocket. I sit there, slumped over and sobbing.

After a while, I gather up the strength to pull myself up. My tears have reduced to light waves, a drop sliding from my eyelashes every few seconds. My breath is still uneven, my lungs raw.

I make my way to the underground, heading back in the direction of home, and friends who care.


	11. Chapter 11

Charlie's POV:

There's a knock on the door. I look up from Mr. Shiny, breaking the concentration of my editing mode. That must be Tom. I stand up and make my way to the front door. Alex has beats me to it, already welcoming him in to our flat.

I smile at him cordially, "Hey Tom".

He nods at me, and looks around nervously, "Hey, thanks for letting me come over," he mumbles to the carpet.

"Yeah, no problem," Alex chimes in, "I've just been playing some Super Smash Brothers on the Wii, would you like to play?"

He brightens up a little, "Yeah that sounds good".

Alex turns to me, "Join us, Charlie?"

"Well, I've got a lot of editing to do, but- sure," I give him a smile.

I flop on to the couch between Tom an Alex. We battle each other for hours. The atmosphere is light and playful with a dash of friendly competition. It was like the old times. Just three mates, hanging out and having mindless fun. So much has changed sense those times. Alex and I, Tom and Kathrin, hell our entire lives. But now we can forget all that, and just be mates.

Once Alex and Tom get bored of there asses being kicked by my mighty Link powers, we witch over to a Star Wars marathon.

Return of the Jedi has barely started the opening credits and Tom is out dead.

I elbow Alex and whisper, "best to leave him be".

He gives me nod and turns off the tellie.

I follow Alex in to his bedroom. He takes off his cloths and gets ready for bed. I do the same.

"What are we going to do about the man passed out on our couch?" I ask Alex, once he has settled down next to me in his bed.

"I didn't know you swung that way, Charlie".

"Only you could take that as an invitation for a three-way, Alex".

"There are some fantasies that are too strong to hide, my dear Charlie".

I punch him on the arm, "My god, Alex! Shut up! I'm never having sex with Tom Milsom!"

"I bet you said the same about me once".

"Would you just let it go?"

"If you insist".

"I insist! Now, you know what I'm really talking about. We can only pretend things are fine and dandy for so long. How are we going to get him away from Kathrin?"

"By doing just that: pretending everything is fine and dandy. He's in denial right now. We just need to occupy him, keep him away until he realizes how much better he feels when he's not around her."

I nod. My fingertips run along the curves of Alex's chest as I lay next him. I begin to lightly kiss his bare chest. Little moans of approval come from with in him. I wander up his neck, slowly, and nibble on his earlobe, teasing him. Alex tangles his fingers in my hair and pulls his lips to mine. We snog for a while, letting our hands and tongues explore each other. Our moves are loving and gentle, not hungry and lustful like before.

Blissfully in love, I fall a sleep to the light up and down of Alex's breath.


	12. Chapter 12

Alex's POV:

I wake with a start. That's odd, I can't remember dreaming. Light has poured in to the bedroom. I glance at the clock on my bedside table. It flashes "7:15". I glance over to see Charlie, still fast asleep.

I pull myself out of bed, careful not to wake Charlie. I'm surprised to see Tom, still stretched out on the couch, his breath light with sleep. I proceed to the kitchen and dig through the fridge until I find something edible.

"Are you making tea?" comes Tom's groggy voice from the living room.

"No, but I can if you'd like some," I answer.

"Yes please," he yawns.

I put the water on and pull two mugs out of the cabinet.

"What would you like?"

"English Breakfast".

His voice is a lot closer than I expect. I turn to see he is standing less than a meter away from me.

"You scared me," I laugh.

"Sorry," he smiles at me from underneath his hair, "I actually wanted to talk to you".

I pull out the tin of English Breakfast and set it on the counter, "Oh yeah?"

"About Kathrin".

I turn around, "Listen, Tom-"

"I broke up with her".

I can barely believe what I've just heard.

"You what?" I babble.

"For good this time".

"Really? Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I don't want it to be true; not when I saw the pills; not when I was crying on the street; not even now. I want to pretend she's better. I want to pretend everything is fine. I want to love her and I want her to love me back. But she doesn't. She doesn't love me. She loves the pills. I'll always come second. So that's why I had to leave. But even now, even knowing the truth, I don't want it to be the truth".

My arms wrap around him. His neck let's loose, his head resting, heavily on my shoulder. His back is shaking as I rub it, comfortingly. It doesn't feel like he's crying but I can't be positive.

"I'm sorry Tom".

It's stupid. So very, very stupid. But it's all I can say.

I'm sorry you met her, sorry she toyed with your heart like a kitten with string, sorry she hurt you, sorry I wasn't there, sorry I don't have anything better to say.

He doesn't say anything back but I know he understands. The whistle of the kettle interrupts us. I remove my self from Tom's arms. Once the tea is ready, I hand a mug to Tom and motion toward the couch. We sit and drink tea in silence.

"You made the right decision, you know," I say, breaking the quite.

"I know. That doesn't make it painless".

I nod, "I'll be here for you, Tom. And you can bet my ass, Charlie will be too. I don't care where or when, I will swim the ocean if I have to, but if you're in trouble, mate, I'll be there, right by your side, to go through it with you".

He smiles, "That's probably the nicest thing you've ever said to me, Alex".

I laugh, "Yeah, well don't get used it!"

His deep chuckle harmonizes with mine.

"Having a party with out me I see," comes Charlie's voice.

I turn to see him standing in the hallway, clad only in his boxer-briefs. His hair is flipped out in random places and his eyes are tired. I can't help but smile.

"Good morning, sleeping beauty," I greet, "we were just celebrating!"

Charlie flops down on the couch next to me, "Celebrating what, exactly?"

I hand my arm around Tom's shoulders, "Our mate Tom, is now a free man".

Charlie's eyes grow wide, "You broke up with Kathrin?"

He nods solemnly, "I did".

Charlie smiles, reassuringly, "I know that must have been hard for you, Tom. But everything will be better now, I promise".

He grins, "I know".


	13. Chapter 13

Three Years Later

Charlie's POV:

Alex comes in to the room a hand over his face. 

I laugh, "What are you doing?"

"It's bad luck to see the bride before a wedding".

I smack him, "Are you kidding me? You're the bride! Besides, I'm not even dressed yet".

"In that case," Alex removes the hand from over his eyes and plants it firmly on my ass. 

His lips meet mine with a passionate kiss.

"Make love to me. Now, before you're old and warn out".

"Oh boy, Alex, you do know how to make a boy swoon," I say sarcastically, "anyway, we can't. We'll be late for our own wedding".

"It'll be quick".

"Alex, I will have sex with you every day for the rest of my life. Just, please, not now".

He grins evilly, "Is that a promise?"

"Sure," I kiss him again.

I shove him out the door, "Now get out. I have to get dressed".

I close the door before he can protest.

I shake my head to myself. Of all the people to fall in love with, it had to be Alex Day. 

I dress myself slowly and carefully, smoothing and tucking, making sure I look suitable. 

There's a knock on the door. 

"Go away, Alex".

The door opens, "It's not Alex".

Hank's head pops in to the room.

"My best man!" I greet him with a hug, "How was you're flight?"

"Pretty good," he reaches out to help me with my tie.

"Thank you".

"No problem," he smiles.

I hear the cheesy sounds of an organ playing. 

"Well, we better head out," I say with a smile.

Arm-in-arm, we enter the church hall and March up to the stand. There, Alex, Tom, and John wait for us. 

"Hello everyone" John speaks up, "And thank you for coming here today, to witness the holy matrimony of these two men. These two lovely people have been good friends of mine for a while now. Not many people saw this relationship coming but once it happened, it seemed as natural, if not more so, than any other. Somehow, they convinced me to run the ceremony today," John laughs, "now you two came up with your own vows, so why don't you say them now".

"Charlie," Alex begins, "I vow my life to you. I will give you my heart and soul and I pray that that is enough for you. All I ask is that you let me wake up every morning, and go to sleep every night, knowing you're laying there beside me".

I smile, tears forming in my eyes, "I do".

The tears escape down my cheeks as I let out a laugh, "I'm sorry," I say, "I'm just really happy and really nervous and sometimes tears just happen," there is a moment of silence before I speak again, "Alex. I vow to be your hands if they are chopped off in some freak accident. I vow to be your eyes if you go blind. I vow to be your voice if it is lost, and I vow to be your heart, if it stops beating. All I ask, is that you take me how I am, with all of my imperfections, and love me anyway".

Alex smiles wickedly, "you're forgetting something Charlie".

I blush, "please don't make me say it out loud".

His face is solid in a most serious manor. 

"Fine," I give in, "".

Laughter erupts from those who understood my mumbling, and murmurs of confusion for those who didn't.

A huge grin runs across Alex's face, "I do".

"By the power invested in me by the online certificate I got, I now pronounce you legal partners. You may kiss the groom".

Alex scoops me up in his arms and plants a kiss on my lips that I happily return. The crowd cheers and applauds.

We parade out the door and in to the white Limo waiting at the curb. We are joined by John, Hank, Edd, Tom, Michael, Liam, Kristina, and Luke. All of our best friends from all over the world come to celebrate our love. I've never been happier in my life.

"Now it's time for the newly weds to have their dance".

Mr. Nerimon starts playing through the speakers. Laughter coats the air as we take the floor. We sway in each others arms. I never want him to let go. I want to stand here, holding him forever. To my delight, the song ends, and song after song beyond that, but Alex doesn't let go. We just hold each other until the end of the night. 

Our empty flat is an obvious juxtaposition from the noisy reception. I go in to my room and take off my suit, slowly, a smile never leaving my face. 

"Mr. Day," Alex's whisper rings in my ear. 

I turn to greet him, "Mr. McDonnell".

He pushes me back on the bed and lies on top of me. His lips press to my neck, nibbling softly. The sensation makes me moan. He doesn't tease for long. He goes almost directly for my cock, hungry with lust. 

My screams of pleasure are uncontrollable as he takes my full length in to his mouth.

I am lost in ecstasy as he enters me. Our breath in quick and in sync. I reach my climax in a harmony of sighs. Pleasure explodes with in me in one great release. Alex cums inside of me shortly after and lays, breathless, on top of me.

"My god, you're good at this," I pant.

"I've got lots of practice," he grins.

Alex flops down next to me in a heap of delicious after glow. I take his nipple in to my mouth until in is hard and swollen. My lips continue to graze his skin in light kisses. 

"Mmmm," he moans with approval.

His eyes are closed, a smile on his lips. I curl up in to him and nod off to sleep. 

He is mine and I am his. Forever.


End file.
